My Lesson Today

Today, I had this rare opportunity to attend the closing meeting of a funeral. A close relative of mine lost his wife two days ago, and the burial was yesterday. Today was the day when the two families meet at the funeral house to discuss the way forward.

It is a traditional meeting that also involves the cleansing of the widow/widower. But with the penetration of education and a blend in cultures and tradition, we had a few misunderstandings, but that was an opportunity for me to learn more.

Marriage is everything, it is sweet and bitter, but I saw today that it can be complicated once one dies, families start asking questions. And if the two families did not get along very well, this day is total chaos. But thank God these two families had respect for each other and got to meet new people and made a few family reunions.

When the widower was cleansed, he was then asked questions which he was required to answer in front of witnesses (us) just like during the marriage ceremony. And I told myself to pay attention to details, and I did. The widower was asked to share with the two families the kind of life the couple had from the time his wife got sick up until she died.

The widower narrated very well, and no questions were raised. This made me realize that it is vital how couples relate. Couples need to love and care for one another every moment of their lives, and there is a need for partners to know one another better every day. This will help you explain to the families should such a thing occur to you.

The other part that struck me was when the widower was meant to inform the two families of any debts his late wife could have left hanging. A good financial standing in a marriage is essential. And it is rather shameful to die today with your spouse left in such a position of shame. And I felt the importance of sharing burdens with our spouses.

I thought of sitting with my wife and discuss family financial management from a different angle. I would love to suggest to my wife that we open a book where we record our past personal debts that we have not cleared and then keep each other in the know should we accumulate more.

I feel this will help regulate our borrowing and guide us to only borrow when it is necessary. Because we shall be subjected to consult our spouse before we borrow.

Our journey through life presents a lot to learn. When an opportunity presents itself to be educated, let open our minds, today’s moment was a rare one, and I shall treasure it forever.